All Eyes Closed Ain't Sleep
My Story. My Truth. My Transformation

My Story. My Truth. My Transformation


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They wrote about her death like it was another number, another night in Little Rock, until I combed through every file and saw the truth. Readers can expect a deeply personal and thought-provoking journey that goes beyond the pages of a traditional memoir. This story explores what happens when pain demands answers, truth refuses to remain buried, and a daughter decides her mother’s story will not be forgotten.

All Eyes Closed Ain’t Sleep
is more than a story about her murder. It is about the unanswered questions left behind, the ripple effects of a single injustice, and the unbreakable will of a daughter who refuses to stop seeking the truth. It is a daughter’s relentless pursuit of truth, accountability, and justice, and her determination to make sure her mother’s life, her story, and her unsolved murder are never forgotten. I may not have felt your arms, but I feel your legacy in mine as I hold my own children and teach them the same resilience you left in me.
Everything I am- my courage, conviction, and my voice was carved out of your fight to live.
So now, Mama, I fight for you. I speak for you.
This book is your resurrection. It’s my soul on paper. It’s our heart that never stopped beating, even when the world stopped listening. I was born from loss, built by truth, and chosen to break generational silence.
You were taken from me, but your truth lives through me.
I dug through secrets, combed through files, read every article, document, and piece of evidence I could find. This case was meant to stay cold and forgotten... I just couldn’t let that happen. As I uncovered lie after lie, I made it my mission to bring the truth to light, no matter where it led me or whom it exposed. While not everyone may understand, this is my mother, my story, and our DNA, interwoven by God, grants me permission to uncover the truth.
This is real justice.
I never set out to become an investigator or a torchbearer for my mother’s memory. But when my mother, Anita Shells, was murdered and her case remained unsolved, I knew I could not allow her story to be forgotten.
I watched my brother suffer. I saw the pain that consumed him, and I knew that wouldn’t be me. I always felt like he got dealt the worst hand ever, and the world just didn’t stop to care. My brother suffered a great deal, and it showed me the weight silence can carry when nobody stops to truly see you.
Even in the seasons when I felt lost, abandoned, or unsure of tomorrow, God's presence anchored me. I turned to Him not just in my darkest moments, but in every moment. He was constant when everything else shifted. One of the clearest examples of His protection happened two months after I bought my home in Little Rock, Arkansas. Thirty-three rounds from an automatic weapon tore through my walls that night. But not one touched me. That wasn’t luck. That wasn’t a coincidence. It was divine intervention, and God wanted me to pursue Justice for my mother.
He kept me alive for a greater purpose.
In the story, you'll discover the case file read cold, as the officers who wrote it had already moved on. Page after page listed names, arrests, and violence like it was nothing more than routine. My mother’s murder—Anita Rena Shells—was there in black and white, but there was no heartbeat in those words. They wrote about her death like it was another number, another night in Little Rock, until I combed through every file and saw the truth

A memoir centered on the murder of Erika Brown-Killian’s mother, trauma, survival, faith, healing, motherhood, and the pursuit of justice.
The Courage to Ask Difficult Questions
A Mother’s Legacy Remembered
Healing from Trauma
Copyright © 2026 All Eyes Closed - All Rights Reserved.
Erika Elizabeth Brown Killian
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